How to ditch the comparisonitis once and for all

When I worked in social media as a freelancer I used to look at every other person and frankly, it freaked me out.

This was because other people had everything sorted and I had nothing sorted.

Everyone else appeared to have a better brand, a better website (not hard given mine was non-existent) and more clients.

I spent a good three years at least comparing myself to others – in the world of social media it was so easy to fall into doing this because we all spend half of our lives online and lots of people are VERY talented, creative and clever.

My inner monologue went a bit like this:

“So-and-so has launched a course! So-and-so has launched a group! I’ve not done any of that how do they do it? How do they get time? How did they even get clients in the first place? OMG I’m doomed.”

But then I realised that how I saw other people was precisely zero percent to do with other people and and 100 per cent to do with me.

Here are my learnings:

1. Love what you do

If you are trying constantly to get clients and it just isn’t quite working for you, and you find yourself wondering how My Great Life Social from Wigan does it so effortlessly, I’m going to sling you a curve ball now.

It is perfectly possible that you are not in love with what you do. Or at least not all of it.

What tweaks could you make so you are doing more of what you love in your daily work? If you hate scheduling but love the creative stuff, how can you make it so you are doing more of that stuff?

Love writing but hate creating content? More writing is where you should be headed my friend.

I swear passion is the number one reason some people stick it out in business. If you love what you do, it really isn’t like work at all.

Doing more of what you love will mean you are having far more fun which means you don’t need to keep half an eye on what your competitors are up to and get freaked out in the process.

If you simply aren’t sure if you are on the right path at all but need to keep going as it pays the bills, that’s more than understandable, but bear in mind. The dollars will be more free-flowing if you are on the right path for you – I have the T-shirt to prove it.

Comparing yourself to others could be a sneaky sign you need to pivot your path or at least set some clear goals. Food for thought eh?

2. Look at others for inspiration or support – not to beat yourself up

Admittedly I do sneak a peak at other coaches sometimes because they all advertise in my Facebook feed so they want to be looked at (yes it’s true, coaches love nothing better than to coach coaches).

However, If I look at any other coaches online it is typically with affection and kindred-ship.

I also look at HOW they achieved success. What steps did they take to get where they are?

This can be helpful and guiding rather than scary.

Many of the softer fluffier coaches are cut from the same cloth as me – I know they are fellow spirits and I admire their work and use it to guide and inspire me. NOT to freak me out.

If you permit yourself the precious time to look at other people online, make sure you are drawing inspiration from it not using it as an excuse to stray from your own track.

In short – stay in your own lane.

If you start looking at others and comparing, it’s a sign you need to get busy working on your own shizzle sharpish.

3. Let your inner star out of the closet

Once you do some work on your mindset, you’ll see how unique and amazing you are RIGHT NOW, without makeup and without doing another course.

When you know how much you rock, you really won’t have any need to look at anyone else and compare.

Indeed, you can look at other people but you’ll know YOU TOO are a star and the only thing stopping you from hitting your goals is some good old fashioned action.

4. Know that you are in the perfect place right now

Look outside. Do you see any trees?

Those trees are doing their thang.

They are just ‘being’ and growing.

They aren’t freaking out comparing themselves to other trees who have more leaves – It’s nature that we all go at our own pace.

If, like the trees, you do the right thing you are meant to do, you can’t fail as long as you keep growing.

You are in the perfect place for you right now and it’s your journey, so make like a tree and stop comparing.

If you would like help with crafting perfect goals and creating a freelance life that suits you down to the ground, I invite you to one free coaching session.

Ping me a message and we’ll get you booked in. One session might be all you need.

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